Sometimes you get knocked in the dirt, then you get back up, dust yourself off, and keep on moving. But sometimes, you get knocked in the dirt, and you’re like “You know what? This dirt is fine. I could totally get used to dirt. Yep . . . just gonna lie right here in the dirt. Dirty McGurty, that’s me.” And then you start to post it on Facebook. But seeing your thoughts manifest themselves in textual form helps you realize that you’re completely pathetic and ridiculous. And you sigh, and pick yourself up, and grudgingly bid goodbye to the dirt.