And for that long week, they dined as would so many Philistines, eating of frozen pizzas, and of the King of Smoothies, and, in flagrant and desperate violation of their political objections, the fil-a of Chic. And there was much wailing and gnashing of teeth. And so, at the end of that grim week, with all the vehemence and passion of Samson wielding the jawbone of an ass, their father didst declare that *tonight* would be *steak* night. And he saw that it was good.