Me, last night: Seriously R____, I’m trying to make dinner, and pack lunches, and do the dozen other things that require my attention, and the last thing I need is for you to ask me to help figure out how to attach a metal trunk to a freaking paper maché elephant head. I mean, this assignment isn’t even graded and it’s essentially supposed to be just a shoebox with crayon decorations so you have a place to receive valentines.

R___: so, you’re saying I shouldn’t be ambitious?

Me: . . . I’ll get the scissors and glue.