Captain’s Log, Stardate 03102014: I’ve persuaded the First Mate to pack bags for the rest of the crew, but that’s small comfort given the fact that she will not be coming on this voyage. If my mission is to boldly go where no man has gone before, then tackling a spring break vacation with four children as a solo parent surely fits the bill. The trip hasn’t even begun and already there are ill omens. The weather forecast is nightmarish. The dog stole a turkey meatball, then barfed it onto the carpet. And I endured what can only be described as a freak bathing accident which, according to the First Mate in her role as Medic, left me with abrasions and “a lower density of hair follicles in the area above the tailbone.” The next entry will be from the road, if we make it to the road. Pray for me. Hamilton out.