I know times are tough, but are we really in a world where kids have to color their menu with only two crayons? I recognize that you merely take the orders, but I’d like to order a red Santa Claus and a green Christmas tree. To say nothing of orange or purple – the apparent step-children of the color scheme. Does it bother you that green is one of three secondary colors but is always given prominence over the other two? No, I can see it doesn’t. Fine, I’ll take a black coffee and the corned beef hash with a heart attack on the side.
* * *
“Dad, he’s eating the butter by itself!”
“But Dad, it has powdered sugar spilled on it.”
* * *
“How are you already out of apple juice?”
“He chugged it to prove to me that he could.”
* * *
“That waitress said she looks cute as a button. Buttons are cute?”
“Yeah, bunnies are cute. Their little noses.”
“Button, not bunny.”
“Button? Why would she say button when there are bunnies she could talk about?”
* * *
“What are you doing with my napkin?”
“I don’t want to get sticky syrup on MY napkin.”
* * *
“Okay, we can stop by the duck pond on the way home, but DO NOT fall in this time.”
[five minutes later] Splash!