It starts out with a non-fat latte, because you’ll be damned if you’ll say “skinny”. Then it becomes a soy latte. Then you’re adding a shot, or maybe two if you’ve got the kids by yourself for the night. Then you’re drinking half skinny/half soy, because the full soy is too sweet with all the added sugar it contains. And before you know it, it takes longer to say your coffee order than it does to order that dirty chai nonsense your wife drinks. And you take stock of yourself, and find yourself wanting. So this time you order your coffee black, as God intended. And all is right with the world again. And while they’re at it, can you get a veggie artisan egg sandwich? But could they heat it just a little longer, because the last one you got wasn’t heated through to the center, and cold egg is gross. In fact, you know what, you’ve changed your mind. Make it a roasted tomato mozzarella panini instead. But only heat it about half as much as normal, because that cheese gets HOT. Seriously, what is it with your microwave? It’s got two settings: still frozen or Fukushima. Oh, and I know I said I didn’t need a receipt, but I just remembered that I’m now keeping all receipts, and I haven’t yet gotten used to that fact.